Tezuka was not surprised when Echizen Nanjiroh showed up at the National
final to watch his son. It was obvious to all of them that Echizen’s growth had been huge recently and a match against
someone as strong even as the weakened Yukimura would be predictable time for him to make a breakthrough to the next level.
He was not surprised at the lack of understanding the man showed when talking
about the 3rd door of Muga no Kyouchi either. Over the previous few months he had learned enough from Ryuzaki-sensei
and the little he knew of Echizen’s earlier training to understand that Echizen-san played tennis almost purely on the
instinctive level.
“There never was a ‘pinnacle of perfection’ to begin with,”
the man said, apparently amused at their ignorance. Tezuka allowed him to finish his lengthy explanation. It wasn’t
as inaccurate as he had feared.
“That’s not strictly true,” he said quietly, eyes fixed
on the yellow-clad figure on the court, a boy who had been fighting for his life in a hospital bed less than a month ago and
who‘d been told 6 months ago that he would never play tennis again.
‘Think of it like an adventure, Tezuka-kun,” he had
said three years earlier, the then irrepressible smile almost making him smile back. “At the moment, it’s
like we’re stuck in a dungeon in a castle and we have to fight our way back out into the sunlight. The only problem
is that the castle guards can tell when we’re scared - you know, like they say dogs can - so we have to really believe
we can do it.” Playing a match with him had been like taking his hand and being led into the sun for the
first time.
“What do you mean, kid?”
“Reaching the Pinnacle of Perfection as Echizen has is reaching the
point where you can overcome and put aside your self-doubt as opposed to not having them at all. Mastering it,” he said,
thinking of the long hours in rehabilitation and training with Miyuki, as he fought against his fears, "takes a lot more
strength.”
“I can’t lose, Tezuka." Seiichi had burst out when
they spoke after his second National victory. Tezuka had seen his friend's shoulders trembling even as
he strove to hide it. Even so he had been slightly envious of his friend for having the opportunity to go so far and
the guilt of it had weighed on him. "Do you know how many people are depending on me? We’re stronger than ever,
we’ve won Nationals twice: if we don’t get there again it will be on my shoulders. And if I do lose . . . If I
lose there are plenty of people who’ll be watching and cheering Rikkai’s fall.”
“You’re speaking as if you’ve reached it also, Tezuka,”
Ryuzaki-sensei said, the question heavily implied.
“A long time ago now. Myself and one other.” It seemed
an age ago, that feeling of freedom, of flying. He sometimes wondered if he'd achieved it just because of the confident
warmth of his friend's smile. He hadn't seen that smile in too long - even on court now, Yukimura was Rikkai's demon
captain, playing with the weight of two National titles on his too-thin shoulders.
“And presumably you lost it,” Inui said, notebook in hand.
Tezuka's eyes slid shut with the phantom ache of vivdly remembered pain. It was not something he wished to talk about
and yet this teaching too was part of being captain. “Mind telling us how?”
“I can’t just play any more, Seiichi,” he had
said after his last match against Rikkai, back in the previous year's tournament, unconsciously rubbing his aching elbow
as he relished the understanding hand on his. “Every time I let go, I injure myself.”
“I lack trust in myself. The third door requires a lot more than just
enjoying yourself. Echizen has, with help, overcome his greatest current burdens but he still has a lot to learn,”
Tezuka said flatly and crossed his arms, not willing to expand further. He had failed himself again today - had
failed his team - in his inability to face Sanada head on soon enough and find a counter to his rival's game.
Fuji's
calm presence shifted slightly closer to his side and Tezuka felt himself relax slightly with that silent support.
“The doctors say I should be able to start light rallies in a month.”
Seiichi had laughed painfully. Tezuka had thought of his time in Kyuushuu, playing for hours every day against a wall even
after the lengthy daily physio to strengthen his muscles again and had imagined how Seiichi would be pushing himself to near
collapse just to be able to stand on the court. “A month! In
a month, Nationals will be over.”
It had been a long time in coming, this meeting of Rikkai and Seigaku
in the Nationals. It felt strange to be facing them in a match that truly mattered and wasn't simply a precursor to
greater things.
In many ways it was terrifying to think that it was going to be his protege
who might depose Rikkai from their throne and shatter their dreams of a third victory, who would make Seiichi face the worst
of his fears. It was clear that Seiichi wouldn't be able to move forwards without that push and yet Tezuka wasn't sure
if he was in any state to be facing anything in his current state.
From the sweat on his forehead and the tortured line of his mouth, Seiichi
could see his impending loss as well. Tezuka watched his already shaky rhythm torn to pieces as he struggled with his
weakened body to meet the demands of the game.
As Echizen relaxed into the game, allowing his instincts to take over, Seiichi
was relying more and more on the strength of his determination alone, his body having gone far beyond it's limit already.
When
the final score was called and Seigaku's team erupted over the barriers in a flood towards Echizen, Tezuka watched Seiichi's
shoulders held upright only by sheer will as he waited with quiet dignity to shake Echizen's hand before he was half carried
back into Rikai's lines with an arm slung around Sanada's waist and Yanagi's calm presence at his side.
Only
then, certain that Seiichi was going to be looked after and presumably receive medical attention, did Tezuka allow
himself to smile at their victory. It might be letting his guard down but in this case he could probably claim that
it was justified.